March 20 is the day of happiness. If you have chronic pain every day, that feeling of happiness can be very far away.
The day of happiness therefore also seems far away. What do you mean, day of happiness, I don't feel happy at all.
Yet that feeling of happiness is close by. Happiness is not something that just happens. Luck is not something that only happens on March 20th. Happiness is a decision, a choice that you make.
HOW? It seems so contradictory. Full of pain, sadness, misery and depression and then CHOOSE happiness…..?
Yes, CHOOSE happiness. It's that simple.
Unfortunately, simple things are sometimes the hardest.
That is why I do not choose the day of happiness, but the happiness of the day.
Small moments of happiness
Just start the day by saying: “I slept wonderfully last night!”
It doesn't matter how you actually slept, just say it as soon as you wake up. That gives a nice positive feeling. By repeating every day (and preferably writing down (see lesson 2 of IPOP) that you had a great night's sleep, you will sleep better. Don't take my word for it, but try it (don't give up too quickly, eh? It takes about 2 months before a new habit is ingrained “The Paindance page 50).
Look in the mirror when you brush your teeth and say to yourself: "You are such a beautiful and happy person!", treat yourself to your most beautiful smile. This also applies: fake it until you make it.
Continue in the day like this and name every positive point you can think of: do you see a ray of sunshine: “wow, how cool that you see a ray of sunshine, how wonderful that is”.
Do you have a nice cup of coffee or a nice cup of tea: How lucky for you!
Didn't your tea bag break while making tea: Gosh, you too have all the luck in the world! How fantastic!!!
If you look at the photo at the left you see a cloud face in profile. I think this is so special. Seeing this was for me a realt moment of happiness.
In this way you do not seek happiness, but you choose happiness. Happiness in small things. Little moments of happiness throughout the day.
If you still can't figure it out, see if the following exercises are something for you
Set an alarm on your phone every hour (choose a nice alarm tone). As soon as your alarm goes off, look around and choose something, at that moment, that makes you happy. This means: Choose something within sight of your eyes, it doesn't matter what. I have a blue wuppie on my desk lamp. I don't remember when I got it or why, but it always makes me happy and I'm so happy that it has the exact same blue color as my lamp.
Sit in a chair or lie down in a place where you won't be disturbed for a while. Make sure you're warm enough.
Relax, close your eyes and think back to when you were happy. For example, this could be the moment you passed your final exams, that you got married, that your child was born, that you conquered a fear or something completely different. For me, a great moment of happiness was the moment of my book launch (link) and that the then alderman of Health and Welfare in Apeldoorn came to my book launch and stayed all evening because he thought it was such an interesting evening.
Picture the moment of happiness in your mind. Think about how you feel, what you see, what you smell, who is with you. Use as many senses as possible. Try to experience this feeling of happiness as deeply as possible. Hold on to this feeling for as long as possible. You can anchor this feeling of happiness with a nice scent (as you learned in lesson three of IPOP) and call it back that way. And when the feeling goes away, let it go. Happiness is an emotion (e-motion = energy in motion) and that is energy in motion. What you put in sours. Be happy that you can recall this feeling at any time.
Before bedtime. List three things you are grateful for today. You can write them down, which is more effective than just thinking about them. Gratitude and happiness go hand in hand. If you are grateful for more things, you will feel happier and it will be easier to conjure up happiness.
Three very basic things you are thankful for. Can't think of anything: think about the fact that you have a bed to sleep in, with a warm blanket. How nice is that!
How lucky we are to have a wonderful bed to succeed in.
Feel it and enjoy this last bit of happiness today before you close your eyes and drift away in a very happy dream.
PS. You can also do these exercises if it's not the day of happiness 😉